Lose Yourself
by Kaine-Minizowa
Summary: Grimmjow has a breakdown after a fight with a barely human man, Aizen just wants his best fighter to be in tip top shape. Ichigo and his twin Shiro are supposed to be Grimmjows example, seeing as they used to be conjoined. This is a really bad summary, just give it a chance. I've also posted it on Archive of Our Own under the name Cradle Crypt


**_Here is a new story, because we all know how much I don't like to finish other ones (I will eventually) I'm on Archive of our own, I'm going to have a few stories on there be different from what's on here under the name Cradle_Crypt See ya there!_**

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**Lose Yourself**

_Chapter 1: Can't Take It_

One punch after another, they fight to the win. Grimmjow Jeagerjaques fights under a contract for Souske Aizen, and once a month he step into the large dirt pit, the sides covered in anything that can impale a person, the top covered by large metal fencing so there is no way out but through the small doors they had been pushed out of. Grimmjow has always been scared. Scared to die and scared to never get out.

The fighter Grimmjow hates more than the others, the one who likes wearing thongs, and that's it, stands on the opposite side of him, making Grimmjow feel more naked looking at him in his small gold thong a smile on his lips as he licks them. He's bald, which makes it worse as he crouches down on all fours and his head catches the light, blinding Grimmjow with how smooth and oily his head is. The sound of the bell rings through their ears just as they both lunge forward dirt flying behind the bald man whose name started with an "I"… the man not really knowing it anymore, becoming more animal than man. The invisible barrier between them that kept the two of them apart was now gone and their war began.

The sound of pounding fists and popping joints could be heard and then three minutes later Grimmjow was standing over his pathetic opponent, rubbing his overly stretched limbs, waiting for the match to be called, and the grunting and sobbing animal like man to be carried away.

The loud bell sounded and Grimmjow was announced the winner, and in five seconds flat Grimmjow was walking down the hall to the dressing room, a frown marring his face, and tears joining in.

"Ah, Grimmjow, you did perfect out there." Aizen called down the long steel hallway, a smile on his face. He saw Grimmjows face and was stunned. It was the first time the man had seen one of his fighters crying. "Gin! Check him out." Aizen called, holding his coat and watching as Grimmjow slipped down to the floor and press his palms to his eyes to stop his crying. Just as Gin touched Grimmjow, Grimmjow growled and pushed the man away.

"Don't touch me! I'm not fucking hurt!"

"What's wrong then?"

Grimmjow sat quietly for a few more minutes before snorting.

"Like you'd understand!" Grimmjow said moodily to Aizen.

"I'd like to." Aizen said.

"You'd like to know? Fine then! Do you know what it's like? Every time I'm in that ring, I'm not fighting some guy I don't know, I'm fighting myself. Tooth and nail! I claw at myself every time. And for what? To die a little each time? I can't do it." Grimmjow shouted shakily. A fist slammed against the red brick wall of the opening to the arena.

"Now, now Grimmjow, if you really think that, then why not lose?" Aizen asked, arms crossed, white business suit riding up slightly.

"Then I lose myself." Grimmjow whispered as he pressed his body against the wall, he was shaking, he was so angry.

"Then you are right I don't understand." Aizen stood over his fighter who was sitting down and throwing a silent tantrum.

"It's all fucking complicated!" The bluenette shouted his response.

"Well, when you're done go get yourself cleaned up and we'll go to dinner and a show, how's that sound?" Aizen asked.

"Tsch." Grimmjow scoffed. "Whatever."

"Great, Gin, have him ready by eight thirty."

"Yes boss. Come on Grimmy-chan, you can't keep boss waiting." Grimmjow grunted and followed Gin down the long hall towards his room to clean and get changed.

* * *

Eight thirty rolled around and Aizen stood in the lobby of what looked like a fancy hotel which Grimmjow couldn't pronounce the name of. Forced out of the car Grimmjow flipped Gin off as he drove away. Aizen grinned.

"You are going to love this Grimmjow. This will be a reward for tonight's win." Aizen led Grimmjow down a long hall draped in red and white velvet. At the end of the hall a man in all black bowed and opened the white curtain exposing all the bright lights and the many people dining while a pair of men fought in a circle of sand.

"Welcome gentlemen, to the sand box fighting arena. Tonight we are featuring our world famous prime rib with asparagus and garlic mashed potatoes. Our greatest seats have been prepared for you Mr. Sosuke."

"Thank you Tesla. We will be waiting at our table. In the meantime, Grimmjow, I want you to watch when two of my favorite boys fight. They're very unusual fighters." Aizen smirked.

"Ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've been waiting for is finally here!" Both of the fighters in the ring had stopped fighting. Both men bloody and being dragged from the ring with sand caked in their wounds. "The Black Shadow versus The Angel." Walking out from behind some curtains a pair of twins, obviously twins from their height and their identical faces, but that was it.

"The Black Shadow is the elder brother, the one with the pale everything. While The Angel is the fruit colored one." Aizen spoke.

Both boys took a stand in their sandy corner, taping up their hands and stretching out their necks like they were looking in a mirror. Grimmjow wondered if they both fought the same too.

"Hey Angel Face, ya know yer ass is mine right?" The elder one spoke over the soft talking in the room.

"You sure, Shadow? I thought you were under me." The orange haired man said with a smirk.

The two boys waited until they we're allowed to fight before they both smirked at each other and began their dance. Grimmjow continued to watch, his eyes trained on the two of them. He watched their movements and looked at their bodies, his eyes getting caught on their identical pair of tattoos, a delicate design of large black inked angelic wings.

"They are literally fighting a piece of themselves, being conjoined twins as children does that to you. They come to terms by fighting each other 'tooth and nail' as you said." Just as Aizen said this both boys landed on the ground, sand flying everywhere. Both biting and clawing at each other, nipping more like it, in a more sexual way than anything.

Aizen groaned as he watched The Black Shadow push The Angel into the sandy ground and punched him in the side causing the orange haired man to curl up and head-butt his brother in the nose with a painful smile as he was able to get the upper hand and straddle his brother and claw down his front causing his brother to bleed. The two of them played for a while before things got real and they were doing moves that Grimmjow had never dreamed of doing. The Angel jumped up and suddenly his legs were wrapped around his brother's neck and he was laughing as The Black Shadow tried to slip out of the hold only to give up and laugh.

A tiny bell that Grimmjow hadn't even noticed before, rang and the fight was over, the Angel won and The Black Shadow that looked stronger stood up and kissed his brother on the mouth before the two of them were called out to by Aizen. Then they were both jumping over the sides of the sand pit and walking gracefully over to the table where Aizen and Grimmjow sat.

"Aizen! How's it going?" They both said in unison. Aizen looked up at them and smiled.

"It's going well. Please, sit, have some water, eat something." Aizen gestured to the two empty seats and both boys took one, looking at Grimmjow the entire time.

"So, who's this blue kitty?" they asked.

"Ichigo, Shiro, this is one of my Espada, Grimmjow, the Sexta."

"The one we've heard so much about?" The two were spot on with the unification of their voices, almost like only one person was there with them.

"Yes, him. I was hoping that your fight would make him feel better."

"Oh, so he's a pervert like you?" Shiro and Ichigo both chuckled and drank some water.

"No… he's actually having a hard time wanting to fight anymore." Both boys dropped their fork and stared in shock at Grimmjow.

"What?" they asked. Grimmjow didn't know what to say.

"Yes, he even cried and I was wondering if he could spend the night with the two of you to see how you both live."

"Yea! Sure thing." They both looked at Aizen and then at each other as if in a communication.

"When am I going to decide anything for myself Aizen? You don't know if I had plans." Both boys looked at him with wide eyes.

"You're voice..." they trailed off. "You think?" They were looking at each other again and then laughed. "Don't worry Grimmjow, we're sure you didn't have anything better tonight than crying yourself to sleep."

"Hey!" Grimmjow growled at the two boys.

"Do we have a deal then?" Aizen asked, not the boys this time, but Grimmjow. The blue haired man groaned and nodded, eating some food and drinking some water before he was pulled out of his seat and away from the table, where Aizen sat there with a creepy smile on his face, waving shortly before Grimmjow was pulled behind the curtains.


End file.
